Ants in my Pants (and other things that discourage me)

I hate bugs. I mean it. Hate. The kind that makes your stomach sick and your fists involuntarily clench up.

Several years ago, I opened a bag of scone mix and out flew 568,987 moths. I cried. Upon closer inspection in my pantry, I had the evil things everywhere.  I cried and almost threw up.  But then, I called my friend Melanie.  Grab a seat, because you are never going to believe this….she had those same moths at her house – IN ANOTHER TOWN- THAT VERY WEEK.  When I had this piece of information, I was actually a little bit better. I know, crazy, right? Somehow, knowing that someone else had the same problem made mine less obnoxious. Less embarrassing. Less terrible.  While we talked we on the phone, she was methodically taking each and every item out of her pantry and tossing things and repacking things and freaking out a little at the same time I was.  It was nice. We bonded. I felt less..oogie. (Please tell me that’s a word.)

Since we moved to the serious south, we have had a problemo with another member of the axis of evil…ants.  I tried eco-friendly attempts to rid our home. It didn’t work. We tried heavy-duty stuff.  The kind of stuff that has 14 pages of warnings with the package.  Nada.  We called in pest control 4 times and finally got rid of them.

Until a few weeks ago. They came back. It’s similar to how those bad Smith guys replicate and are untouchable in the Matrix sequels. We can’t get rid of them. I want to throw up. I scream. I spray poison. I wonder what lesson I am supposed to be learning from this. It is embarrassing. I hate them. And no one else has them. I don’t know if I am conveying this strongly enough – my hatred of the ants. Are you getting it?

Tonight, we are having company over for dinner. A wonderful young couple with a darling little baby girl. I am sure they have never had ants take over their home.  I thought the day was going smoothly. I was getting things ready when I saw them, marching across the wall and up to the ceiling in our breakfast room.  I can’t understand why they seem to appear when I am going to have company over. I told Tommy I thought God must be trying to tell me something, but I just don’t know what it is. Do I need to remove any smidgen of pride I might have left in my heart? Is it to humble myself before others? Is it to expose my weaknesses to others? I don’t know but I just about can’t take it anymore…:-)

Okay, I probably can.

What I am thinking about this whole thing is this: When you find out that someone else is going through what you are – or even something similar…doesn’t it make things a little better? Why then, are we so scared to be transparent? What makes us think we are the only people on Earth to have ever walked through the mud and cowpies we are currently sloshing through? Let’s start a revolution! Tell someone what you are going through and bear your burdens with them.  I’ll bet we’ll find out we are not the only ones facing those moths, that fear, that grieving, that exhaustion, those hormonal imbalances, etc…  I’ll be first.  Taking a deep breath right now and:

I have ants. I can’t get rid of them and they give me the heebie-jeebies.

There, I said it.

Oh, and that thing about the hormonal imbalance? That might be me, too.





6 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Cassie
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 17:41:18

    I just love you, girl!!! I love your transparency!!!! And since this is confession time 🙂 Hi, my name is Cassie and although I don’t have ants at this time I do know I have hormonal imbalances!!! ;-D


    • Janna
      Nov 01, 2010 @ 21:51:50


      Everybody now…”HI CASSIE!!”

      Welcome to the hormonal imbalance support group. Sit right here next to the a/c register…and have some chocolate.




  2. Vanessa
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 17:51:44

    Well honey, I’ve got ants too. They are in my garbage can…. so they won’t leave anytime soon. Better than that….. I have two mice. I’ve set 5 traps…. nothing. Oh, they are enjoying all the peanut butter and cheese. Because I live near a cow pasture, each time it rains or the temp drops, I get mice. Oh, and want to know the real kicker…. because it’s colder now, a nice skunk family has taken up residence under my house. If anyone comes to visit the first words are, “Oh my, did a skunk spray?” A garbage can full of ants, two mice, three skunks and four kids. Oh, yes, I have a happy little home. Love you!!!


    • Janna
      Nov 01, 2010 @ 21:35:44

      Vanessa – Don’t you already feel better? I do! We had mousies when we lived near a field. We had to do the sticky traps. Those were gross. Skunks make nice pets….:-) At least you have your weekend dancing!!! You DO have a happy home!

      Love you –


  3. Melanie
    Nov 01, 2010 @ 18:16:18

    oh my gosh, I remember that day so well. I called our exterminator crying my eyes out. I STILL regularly inspect my pantry. In fact, there have been times I have taken EVERYTHING out to do a thorough inspection. Brad doesn’t even ask anymore bc he knows it is me feeling nervous about those moths again. I hope you find a way to get rid of the ants. My Nanaw’s tried and true way is mixing sugar and boric acid (I think) together and leaving it out. She says they get it and take it back to their home and it will kill them all. I still have little ones, so that is not something I can leave out…


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