When you’ve had a bad day

Today was not my favorite day. In light of my last post, this one is going to be honest.  It may be painfully honest. It feels a little painful on this end, at least.

What happens when I’ve had a bad day? Allow me to give you a glimpse of the end and work backwards:

I arrived at the school parking lot with tears in my eyes.  I had just shoved the last McDonald’s french fry in my mouth and slugged down some sugar-laden Sprite while I called my sister.  Dear Reader, did you know that I am allergic to McDonald’s french fries? Well, I am.  This is in addition to the fact that they aren’t remotely good for you. It didn’t matter to me. I was sad and those fries were my tonic.  Every bite was delicious.

My last few moments at work today involved crying to my boss while I blew my nose. There’s nothing that says professionalism quite like runny snot and a quivering, can’t-catch-my-breath voice that says, “I’m sorry I keep crying.”  Awesome.  I’m pretty sure I scared him to death with my specialness. I knew french fries were going to be part of my day after that.

This Hallmark moment was preceded by me walking at Olympic race-walking speed down the stairs to Mr Darcy’s office. I was trying my darndest not to sob hysterically along the way nor make eye contact with anyone I encountered. I made it to his office – where he was not – when the eye contact occurred with a co-worker. Cue waterworks. She asked me what was wrong and I tried to pantomime getting a phone call that was not delightful. There is no game of charades that could adequately prepare you for acting out “I had a disturbing phone call.”  It was more like a mixture of “hang loose” and “Help, I’m trapped in an invisible box and I can’t get out.” All because I was terrified of opening my mouth. So now I was doing a ridiculous hand jive and crying. Fantastic. I’m all for honesty, but my hubby’s office is smack-dab in the middle of CounselingLand. It’s similar to CandyLand, but without the Peppermint Forest. Seriously, I did not want the people who have devoted their lives to helping people get past their “stuff” see me having a breakdown moment. That’s a little twisted, isn’t it?

Within minutes, Mr Darcy magically appeared. I am quite sure he was not thinking, “In just a few moments I’m going to round this corner and my precious wife will be having a meltdown in my breakroom.” But yet, there I was. He listened while I cried and talked and then he hugged me and prayed for me. At that moment, I was so very thankful for two things: First, that my hubby loves Jesus and me so much. Second, that we both work in a place where praying during work hours is actually part of what we do. I decided right then and there that my workday had ended. The french fries weren’t even on my radar.

Prior to my speedwalk downstairs, I received the not-so-much-fun phone call. The caller was not intending to be unkind, I’m sure. Right? It happens. I won’t give you details on the call, but it wasn’t my favorite moment of the decade. This phone call from the pit of Persephone’s vacation home was preceded by several nights of poor sleep and exhaustion. I’m sure that didn’t help.

So what’s a girl to do after she’s had a rough day, scared her husband, boss, and several co-workers, and made herself sick on french fries? She blogs. She blogs because she thinks it’s important that people know that we ALL have bad days – bad moments – bad phone calls. Sometimes, we’re the instigator of the unkind phone call. Sometimes we’re on the receiving end.  Either way, it’s rough. Sometimes, french fries seem like a great temporary band-aid.  But this is real. It’s part of life. So, at the end of a bad day this girl will sing. I”ll sing at the top of my lungs if that’s what it takes to feel better. I’ll sing and I’ll remember this verse from Psalm 59:16:

But I will sing of Your power;
Yes, I will sing aloud of Your mercy in the morning;
For You have been my defense
And refuge in the day of my trouble.

 

Here’s to finding our voices.

~Janna

 

 

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1 Comment (+add yours?)

  1. Alyssa
    Mar 19, 2014 @ 18:23:56

    I am sorry you had a no good rotten day. I love you more than my luggage. You are one of my very all time favorites.

    Reply

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